Do you believe...

OH, your roots....

2005-11-23T16:05:49Z

Pour une fois je veux que ma vie être fermement plantée dans mes propres mains, au lieu de dégoutter de mes pointes de doigt.

Je suis EXTREME aussi relate-able.

je suis terriblement désolé pour n'importe quelle douleur que j'ai causé. je vous aime

the constant buzzing buzzing buzzing

2005-10-24T23:27:25Z

busy as a bee.hive.soooo i'm about to be alicexcore ahhaha core. and do a recap of this weekend.

friday. work. hannah. 80s. walmart. target. faery wings. rain. saturday. work. jonathon. m&ms. market. boring. rushed home. skipped the fair. :(. went to kks apt. went .... ah i dont feel like remembering the rest.

ah. how i wish i was back in the days of the looking glass, when everything was black and yellow, and friday and saturday were set(by the swing). when you weren't supposed to inhale; and we would choke on wine and coke.

i will forever be 13. {[i am trapped]}

my pilot light has flickered out.

2005-08-30T01:22:22Z

cells my dear, they do divide.

movies i want to see
- 40 year old virgin
- cremaster
- exorcism of emily blahblah
- devils rejects
- march/penguins
- transporter 1&2

crazyyy dreams as of late... some VERRRY good, other VERRY bad...

PS: don't watch doppelherz while trying to sleep: nothing good will come of it

0pen_______book @ 2005-08-19T15:18:00

2005-08-19T19:55:02Z

*first semester*
1. intro to communications- Gavin
2.AFM- Siler
3.anatomy& physioloogy - townsend
4.vietnam- moore

*second semester*
1. life management- McDowell
2. sculpture/cereamic- Poppee
3.English IV - Garrison
4.sociology- Dockery

0pen_______book @ 2005-08-15T23:29:00

2005-08-16T03:33:50Z

school starts soon. summer seemed to be pacing along nicely but as soon as i got into the swing of things, its over. but it had to happen sometime. it shall be nice to see everyone again. but really suck to see certain people again, oh well i can ignore them. i suppose i shall be applying to colleges soon. jesus i can't believe i'm that old already. just last week i was making fairy wings with hannah. and despite what YOU might think, i CAN live on my own. :) ho hum ho hum. i'm pretty sure i had something else to say when i started this.. but at this time... i cannot recall. iloveyouallverymuch. <3.

0pen_______book @ 2005-08-12T01:33:00

2005-08-12T05:37:40Z

just sort of hanging in the balance.

there's spring in the air (stolen from melanie)

2005-08-09T05:16:03Z

1. On your current playlist, hit shuffle and pick the first 20 songs on the list (no matter how cheesy or embarrassing).
2. Write down one line of the song. Try to avoid putting the song title in the line.
3. Have your friends comment and see if they know the songs. (NO CHEATING!)
4. When someone guesses correctly, strike out the line and list the correct name of the song next to it. (don't strike out the line until the song's ARTIST and NAME have both been guessed correctly!)

1. You always knew it was on purpose
Yeah what's the point if it don't serve it's purpose

2. All my stitches itch
My prescriptions low, I wish you
Were queen
Just for today
2. Marilyn Manson- Great big white world

3. ~~True beautiful one, what have you gone and done? i can see all your moves are new, tell me what did that salesmen do to you.~~
Metric- on a slow night

4. So who will follow? Who is the lead?
I know I'll leave a stain, because I bleed
As we dance, we all dance

5. I've been barking
snarling growling snapping
at the tails of others
I've been feeding
off the scraps they left behind
and begging for more
Daisy Chainsaw- dog with sharper teeth

6. We see the banker sitting waiting for a trim.
And then the fireman rushes in
From the pouring rain, very strange.

7. When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home
The Postal Service- such great heights

8. From the other side of the Underscene
To the boulevard of broken dreams
Deadsy- Key to grammercy park

9. Humble and helpless
Learning to pray
Praying for visions
to Show me the way
Show me the way to forgive you
A Perfect Circle- Thomas

10.
gave up trying to figure out my head got lost along the way
worn out from giving it up my soul i pissed it all away
still stings these shattered nerves
pigs we get what pigs deserve
Nine Inch Nails - last

11.
I'm on your side
Nowhere to hide
Trapdoors that open
I spiral down

12.
They always wants to see monster movies
So they can hold me when they think I get scared
They are surprised when I'm not turned on
By their fantasies about how it's done

13.
~~beat my head to wake up cause I feel as if I'm sleeping~~
skinny puppy - empte

14. i could make a dress
a robe fit for a prince
i could clothe a continent
but i can't sew a stitch
Dresden Dolls- Perfect fit

15.
when i'm drowning in the sea, i am
when you're looking down at me, i am
Kidney Thieves - Black Bullet

16. the sky is always falling down on me
so officer forgive me please!
Dresden Dolls- gravity

17. hey coffee eyes. you got me coughin' up my cookie heart. makin' promises to myself. promises like seeds of everything i could be

18. When I've looked right through to see you naked but oblivious
And you don't see me
a perfect circle- 3 libras

19.
~~tonight your ghost will ask my ghost, where is the love, tonight your ghost will ask my ghost, who put these bodies between us~~
Metric - Calculation theme

20. I think i'll go home and mull this over
Before i cram it down my throat
At long last it's crashed, it's colossal mass
Has broken up into bits in my moat.

0pen_______book @ 2005-08-01T14:28:00

2005-08-01T18:32:39Z

THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS!
366 days until

getting pierced

getting tattooed

(i dont smoke but) i'm definatly buying cigarettes BECAUSE I CAN!

and yes... its true... you can't buy pets... or even play with them until your 18

thats right babyyy 17 tomorrow (august 2nd!!)

and incase you forgot what i look like

me and maggie!!!!

0pen_______book @ 2005-07-25T00:48:00

2005-07-25T04:53:13Z

i'm listening to the radiohead my brother uploaded on my computer... OHMYGOD i can't even describe how incredible this is. and how good it makes me feel.

... and keep the rain in the sky where it should be

2005-07-23T04:14:54Z

well my self esteem has officially been killed. i haven't had a day like this in months. i just feel so rejected-- by everyone. but tomorrow is a new day, and it shall not be like this one.

GO PLACIDLY

0pen_______book @ 2005-06-27T13:17:00

2005-06-27T17:19:43Z

I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions, no more no less. Ask me anything you want. Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.

SOHGBOAEUORHY9OAEHROAJDB

2005-06-26T00:04:31Z

well WELL well, haven't updated in forever... been to lazy/busy. things with work are going well, things with Eric are going very well <33 things around the house are well. currently jim (my 21 year old brother), Elanore(his girlfriend) and Maggie(Elanores 2yr old daughter) are at our house before they go to vacation at the beach. maggie is probably the cutest little girl i've ever seen. i'm thinking about making new journal because this name bores me, and i want to make a new background... but i dont want to change this one. but i dont have another yet. okay this was boring, sorry. i love you peopleeeeee. bye<3

YAYYY

2005-06-20T05:33:10Z

First Name:	Sarah, but you can call me SaSu
Middle Name:	catherine
Birthday:	august 2nd leo baby!
Eyes:	green
Hair:	brown/reddish = auburn
Fav color:	greeeeen or blue or something
Day/Night:	night
Fave Food:	perogies, pizza
*FRIENDS AND LIFE*
Do you ever wish you had another name?	god yes.. all the time
Do you like anyone?	my boyfriend ERiccc
Which one of your friends acts the most like you?	KK
Who's the loudest?	kk
Who have you known the longest of your friends?	KK
Who's the shyest:	hannah
Are you close to any family members?	meh hardly :(
When you cried the most:	when i was a baby
What's the best feeling in the world:	being in love <333
Worst Feeling:	being lonely and sad
*FINISH EACH SENTENCE:*
Let's walk on the:	beach
Let's run through:	the flowers
Let's look at the:	stars
What a nice:	bicycle ... idk first thing that came to my head
Where did all the:	asodhgoenrg
Why can't you:	BE NICE!!!
Silly, little:	boy
Tell me:	your secrets
*HAVE YOU:*
Ran away from home:	no
Pictured your crush naked:	dont have to bitch!
Skipped school:	a period this year.. and once to finish a paper... sorry... i'm a nerd :-*
Broken someone's heart:	yes
Been in love:	yes
Cried when someone died:	yes
Wanted someone you knew you couldn't have:	duh who hasn't
Done something embarrassing:	DDDNOPE NEVER EVER IN MY LIFE
Done a drug:	yes
Cried in school:	yes
*RANDOM*
Your Good Luck Charm:	pennies i stick in my bra, basically little things i find that i luck
Person You Hate Most:	mean peopleee
Best Thing That Has Happened:	being in love and having friends
Ice Cream:	PEANUTbutter or mint choc chip or vanilla or goodberrys or GOD I LOVE ICECREAM
WHO Makes you laugh the most:	Eric, Hannah and KK
Makes you smile:	billions of people... and animals :D
Has A Crush On You:	Eric, and HANNAH I THINK SHE DOES TOO THAT GAY-WAD
Do You Have A Crush On Someone:	Ericccc
*HAVE YOU EVER*
Fallen for your best friend?:	no
Made out with JUST a friend?:	no
Kissed two people in the same day?:	yes
Had sex with two different people in the same day?:	no
Been rejected: .	i'm sure i have but i can't think of anything as of right now
Been in love?:	yessir
Been used?:	same answer as rejected
Done something you regret?:	duh
Cheated on someone?:	no
Been called a tease:	who hasn't!
*WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...*
You touched?:	Eric
You talked to on the phone?:	Eric
You hugged?:	Eric
You instant messaged?:	Kristin
You kissed?:	Eric
You yelled at?:	dont remember
Who text messaged you?:	KK
Who broke your heart?:	dont remember
Who told you they loved you?:	Eric
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

sticky sticky sticky bun!

2005-06-06T04:07:14Z

today was amazing! yay! worked with lindsay at the farmers market from 7-4, shes so sweet i love her. i love the people there, they're so friendly, and they are so willing to help you out. its like the attitude i'm supposed to have for work, being friendly and sweet, is not only making me happy, its turning into a natural thing... and i love that. yay! sarah likes to be nice to people now! anyways, so after work i picked up Eric from work, and he took me out for dinner because he is such a sweetheart like that. After a very yummy dinner we came back to my house, listened to the misfits and talked lots and laughed lots and had lots of fun. i love him so much! he's incredible to be around. his aura just makes everything seem a little bit better, and people like that are hard to come by. eventually i took Eric home, and came back here and i am writing this. <33333

COME ON GET HAPPY!

.. if you think this is all incredibly cheesy you can suckkkk on it because i'm soooo happyyyyy!!!!

put your hand down little steve!

2005-06-01T02:36:39Z

well well well, i've been at the beach with the Dressel family, it was quite a grand time. hmmm... well... we left on friday, went to the beach, went ocean fishing (didn't catch anything) went to the pool, went in the hot tub, went on the pier, played bocci ball, played video games, went to jungle land, ran ontop of the dunes during sunset with Eric, had many good talks, watched in good company, and get over it, listened to lots of great music, played LOTS of name game, old maid, egyptian rat screw, etc. ate many marvelous dinners, had many big laughs, had the most fun i've had so far this summer. the only bad part was that i didn't bring my camera. i love that family <33

today i went to CD warehouse and got
- deftones - white pony
- hungry lucy - apparitions
- mineral - endserenading

went to get wendys with patrick.

++

2005-05-26T00:18:00Z

so the school year ended as planned. my last day i didn't have a 2nd exam so i picked up Eric at school and we went to moe's and ate, and talked, and twas fun. got starwars episode IV from patrick, went back to my house and watched that, twas fun. hopefully, i'll be going to the beach with the dressel family on saturday, and if i can find someone to cover my 1-7:30 shift at work. that would be fantastic. I AM SO HAPPY. things are going wonderfully. i couldn't ask for anything more. <333

have you had your haircut?

2005-05-16T02:07:07Z

wel wel welk , lets see. The Haircuts show was goooood
(Haircuts =Eric/base&vocals, Max/guitar&vocals, John/keyboards, Carla/backupvocals, Sam/drums&synth) i especially enjoyed: Dark entries, and Raoul. they're like nothing i've ever heard and seen before. <3Eric<3

i can't believe how close school is to being out! i'm excited!!

0pen_______book @ 2005-05-14T10:34:00

2005-05-14T14:45:38Z

this is the infinity symbol.

♡♡♡sometimes, you can just feel it when something is going to last that long. ♡♡♡<333

FEEL BETTER <3

2005-05-13T03:13:41Z

I am waiting for the sun to rise
my oh my it looks so searing
ragged laughing
I would flower
I would flower if I could
Lovely people go on by my dreams
I'm so green
I shake in my shoes
hoped I'd die
I'd die before I'm old
but poor and old I'd wish on no one
no one
Brave pink flower
Brave pink flower
Please please I've not yet grown tired of this
earthly life hey dear friends lets take a ride
in the countryside .....
pale pink flower
-----------------------------------
I speak in verses, prophecies and curses
This storm of thorns is growing
There's no end in sight
Chaos claws my jaw
And incites a mental riot
I'm in the mouth of madness
With a tongue of poetry
I ate the spine of Atlas
Now the world is crushing me

pretty on the INSIDE.

2005-05-04T01:39:22Z

i have mixed feelings about this summer. it'll be nice to have free time to myself to do whatever i want to do... but when i have too much time to myself... i get a little loopy.

ITSSOOBVIOUSI'MSOOBLIVIOUS.

0pen_______book @ 2005-04-30T00:02:00

2005-04-30T04:11:17Z

welllll lets see. today at school was ghey for the exception of 1st period... mad luvvv to muh niggaz in Petey's class. I MISSED YOU PATRICK!!!!! well at lunch i got a call from clark telling me that he was in the hospital... but he's okay now so no worries. then after school i got home, changed, went to visit clark... had a good conversation about lots of stuff. then i picked up hannah from work and we went to Panera, dollar store, then to Ben's concert. he was really great. talked to hannah, beth, lindsay, and beth's friend Kaitlyn i think?? talked... but i didn't catch her name. we made plans for our white girl kill squad... we already have a target in mind. HEHEHEHEEHEHAWEROGHAOIRGHOADH. saw Eric for a little... we couldn't talk much though b/c the band was playing haha. his hair looked cute. then hannah came back to my house and we watched saw ahhahaha hannah is the best person to watch scary movies with... she FREAKS the fuck out hahah <33

tomorrow is jamfest... blah that'll probably be boring b/c i probably wont know/like that many people there. and then i think i'm hanging out with Eric... but nothing is for sure.

ITS ALL ABOUT TIME management.

i'm always wrong... initially

2005-04-27T23:38:57Z

I've got a new dress
with large breasts
and I look funny
My beautiful boy
Who has brown eye
we both smell immensely
We live in our dreams
He lives with self
will open up
And now he bashes his head
Again and again
On my bed
On my knees
He's an odd boy
lucky boy
makes big noise
with big bottle
Lovely ugly cruel world
Lovely ugly cruel world
I wear a nice blue hat
Just to keep in with the swing of things

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:	Sarah, but you can call me SaSu
Birthday:	august 2nd leo baby!
Birthplace:	Cary
Current Location:	Cary
Eye Color:	greeeeen
Hair Color:	brown
Height:	5'2
Right Handed or Left Handed:	right
Your Heritage:	english, scottish, welsh
The Shoes You Wore Today:	black vans with the pink shoelaces everyone hates
Your Weakness:	tasty food
Your Fears:	being alone, havin no one love me.
Your Perfect Pizza:	cheese and stuffed crust
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	be totally comfortable being myself... i'm getting better at that already :)
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	hahahahsodfhjoahgohg
Thoughts First Waking Up:	i'm so glad i have a reason to wake up
Your Best Physical Feature:	eyes, neck, back
Your Bedtime:	wheneva i want bytch
Your Most Missed Memory:	Ashley Evans
Pepsi or Coke:	pepsi
MacDonalds or Burger King:	burger king.... but my McDonalds voice is cuter hahaha
Single or Group Dates:	single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	i hate tea
Chocolate or Vanilla:	VANILLA
Cappuccino or Coffee:	ewie
Do you Smoke:	occasionally cigarettes, not pot
Do you Swear:	yes
Do you Sing:	yes
Do you Shower Daily:	yes
Have you Been in Love:	HELL YEAH BABY, i am right now!
Do you want to go to College:	yes, hopeuflly Elon or something relaxed like that
Do you want to get Married:	yes
Do you belive in yourself:	yes
Do you get Motion Sickness:	sometimes
Do you think you are Attractive:	sometimes
Are you a Health Freak:	yes, but i dont act on it
Do you get along with your Parents:	to some degree
Do you like Thunderstorms:	yes
Do you play an Instrument:	vocal chords
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	no
In the past month have you Smoked:	cigarettes
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	define drugs
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	no
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	no
In the past month have you been on Stage:	no
In the past month have you been Dumped:	no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	i dont think so
Ever been Drunk:	yes
Ever been called a Tease:	who fucking hasn't
Ever been Beaten up:	nahhhh
Ever Shoplifted:	yeah
How do you want to Die:	peacefully, with a long happy life behind me
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	a good person
What country would you most like to Visit:	europaaa
*In a Boy/Girl..*
Favourite Eye Color:	green
Favourite Hair Color:	anything but blonde
Short or Long Hair:	either
Height:	5 inches taller than me
Weight:	medium
Best Clothing Style:	band shirts, jeans
Number of Drugs I have taken:	shit if i know
Number of CDs I own:	lostadem
Number of Piercings:	tenbillioninmyear
Number of Tattoos:	cero
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	809auw4 9t8uy 4wehja
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

1). YOUR PORN STAR NAME - (NAME OF FIRST PET + STREET
YOU LIVE ON): Pepper Schubauer

2). YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME - (GRANDMOTHER'S FIRST NAME +
FAVORITE SNACK FOOD): Grace Cheetos

3). YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME - (FIRST WORD YOU SEE
ON YOUR LEFT + FAVORITE RESTAURANT): Pantene Rudino

4). YOUR FOREIGN NAME - (FAVORITE SPICE GIRL + LAST
FOREIGN VACATION SPOT): Ginger Maryland

5). YOUR SOCIALITE NAME - (SILLIEST CHILDHOOD NICKNAME
+ FIRST TOWN WHERE YOU PARTIED): Sally Cary

6). YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME - (FIRST INITIAL + FIRST
THREE LETTERS OF YOUR LAST NAME): S-Sut

7). YOUR DETECTIVE NAME - (FAVORITE ANIMAL + NAME OF
HIGH SCHOOL): Penguin Hope

8). YOUR BARFLY NAME - (LAST SNACK FOOD YOU ATE + YOUR
FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK): Cookie Vodka

9). YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME - (MIDDLE NAME + STREET WHERE
YOU FIRST LIVED): Catherine Dutchess

10). YOUR ROCK STAR NAME - (FAVORITE CANDY + FAVORITE
MUSICIAN'S LAST NAME): Skittle Garside

11). YOUR "POPULAR" NAME - (FAVORITE CELEBRITY'S FIRST
NAME + BEST FRIEND'S STREET NAME): Scarlett Sequoia

12). YOUR OPPOSITE SEX NAME - (NAME OF [OPPOSITE SEX]
FRIEND + CELL PHONE COMPANY YOU USE): Eric Alltel

no plans for this weekend. except for jamfest pretty much, blah. anyone wanna hang out? i need someone to go to jamfest with

HUNGRY-MAN

2005-04-24T19:49:30Z

written yesterday about yesterday
lala. today was interesting. first day of work. blah. some parts weren't so bad, but some parts i did not enjoy. it just kinda sucks not really knowing what to do. talked to an "olde friend" haha they had some really interesting things to say... i totally understand their perspective, but it's just so hard for me to be that cynical towards people.... maybe thats because i'm naive, or jaded, or both. blah.

written today about yesterday
snuck over to Erics house b/c his parents weren't home, got caught, but i didn't go back home until 3pm. it was fun. i love Eric so much. it was so awesome to sleep with him next to me, i feel so safe : )
so anyways... today i came home and i got grounded. adbfonaeohoehg. oh well. it was worth it

"i thinks she's dead"

2005-04-23T03:26:05Z

today was a blur. i am a list girl so my day will be "shot".

- woke up and went to Erics house
- had fun at Erics house, ate really good icecream, watched a bit of a movie
- left Erics house, and Matt Payne called and said he wasn't doing anything either, so we went& got pizza, then picked up Clark, and went to the bond park show.
- got really bored and kinda sad so i saw two cute girls so i sat down and talked to them.
- the 2 girls turned out to be Joanie (Koontz) and Nadia (papalaobaofbrohrgoaer) something or other haha i can't say her last name. they were cool, Joanie reminded me of Beckax200000 percent, it was crazy.
- went with joanie, nadia, some guy and some other guy to the park, we swang, and then i wanted to go back so i could get home on time... sorry i made y'all walk back with me <33
- joanie and nadia said i reminded them of kate winslet in 'eternal sunshine of the spotless mind' i thought that was cool
- met a lot of great people tonight
- hung out with mongo a bit
- this is all out of order
- i realized a lot of things tonight
- I AM currently realizing i am too tired to finish this and will do so at a later date.

0pen_______book @ 2005-04-20T21:36:00

2005-04-21T01:43:02Z

Friends, Only.